When one door closes..

Recently, I heard that phrase used by a former vice-presidential candidate. However, I’ll try not to hold that against this post.

I haven’t done a lot of door shutting or opening this year as far as my science is concerned. I’ve done a bit more with regards to my personal life, though.

The biggest things that happened this year are that Dr. Man came home and that my dissertation research is in full swing. Those are both wonderful things, but they’re difficult to have together. Prior to him moving home, I could go home from the lab, eat, play with the Dixie Dog, and then come back to the lab to work some more. Also, if I spent hours in the lab on the weekends, eh, it wouldn’t matter. Those weren’t the healthiest of habits, but it allowed me to take three day weekends every other week to travel to ResidencyTown.

Now, he’s home and it’s a bit of an adjustment. My advisor is pretty flexible about face time and he allows us to set our own schedules. So it’s up to me to decide to come in and what work to get done. That means that if a protocol is time sensitive and requires work on a Saturday, it’s up to me to make myself come in to the lab. That’s hard for Dr. Man to understand. There’s rarely a time where he gets a choice about what hours to work (the clinic has normal operating hours). And when he works weekends it’s because he’s on-call, not because he knows that a few hours on a Sunday will save an entire days worth of work.

That’s not to say that Dr. Man is an over-bearing tyrant or anything. It’s closer to a puzzled look when I tell him that I’m willingly going into work on Sunday (ramping up to incredulous when I wake up in the middle of the night to go check on– or start– some experiment). And I feel guilty when I choose to take time away from my personal life to spend time on my work life.

To finish the above metaphor: The door has closed on the obsessive (and unhealthy?) work habits, but a door has opened to the possibility of being happy in grad school.

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5 Responses to When one door closes..

  1. ScienceGirl says:

    Mmmm, that new door sounds wonderful – best of luck walking through it!

  2. I have the opposite problem. DH often tells me to work late or go in for a bit to make sure things get done quickly/most efficiently. I often feel like he’s shoo-ing my out the door. 😉

    But ScienceGirl is right. That does seem like the better problem to have.

  3. Science Girl: That may end up being my New Years theme.

    SGG: I think either way it’s difficult. You’re either being shoo-ed out or feeling guilty. It’s still hard to maintain balance.

  4. chall says:

    yeah… I know what you mean.

    I am still struggleing with not feeling guilty those days when I have to get in early in the morning and stay late… for like a week at a time. I guess it is all about trying to explain it?

    It helps, for me and him, if I take a real weekend off every once in awhile and we do something togther.

    good luck though. It sounds good with your life!!

  5. Chall: I think that’s part of the plan for the upcoming year. Taking more real weekends. It might, also, be helpful for my sanity.

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